10 Tips for Maintaining Mental Health Over the Holidays

Happy Holidays

'Tis the Season to be Jolly. That rings true for some, but not for everyone. In fact, a large portion of the population finds themselves overwhelmed with the demands of the holidays. The American Psychological Association conducted a survey and found a solid 38% of us feel a measurable increase in our levels of anxiety, stress, and even depression. 

Even the merriest of individuals can encounter moments when you can relate more to the Grinch than to Santa. In the midst of twinkling lights and glittering store displays, there are many triggers that can intensify holiday stress levels.

Some of these include:

• Loss of loved ones
• Illness
• Lack of time
• Commercialism and over-the-top hype
• Lack of money
• Family dynamics and conflicts
• Poor eating habits
• Pressure of giving and getting gifts
• Long list of commitments - shopping, cooking, parties, etc.
• Preexisting mental health issues

It is easy to feel stressed under the weight of those demands. The wonder and fun of the holidays can easily give way to worry and unhappiness. The long list of other's expectations, time demands, money drain, and other obligations can quickly add up.

My goal is to help you live your best life. You can't do that while ignoring your mental health. I want you to know that you are not alone when it comes to holiday stress and anxiety, but you have the ability to manage them. 

"The holidays stress people out so much. I suggest you keep it simple and try to have as much fun as you can." 

-Giada De Laurentiis

Here are some strategies to help you cope with the many holiday challenges. Use some of them or all of them to guard and maintain your mental health during the holiday season.

10 Tips for Maintaining Mental Health Over the Holidays

1. Feel Feelings Freely

There is no shame in feeling overwhelmed, hurried, sad, stressed, or lonely over the holidays. Nearly 4 out of 10 people do, so you do not have to pressure yourself into being cheerful or happy all the time.

Allow yourself to experience and express your emotions when they occur so that you can maximize your ability to enjoy other moments of holiday joy.

2. Bring on Boundaries

Along with the holidays comes a plethora of demands and expectations from work, family, and others. Your mental health can take a hit when you feel pressure to attend every function, satisfy others, and complete every task.

That can easily contribute to your feelings of stress, resentment, and holiday burnout. It is okay, and in fact imperative, to set clear and healthy boundaries with others, making sure to say no when you need to in order to maintain the proper balance in your life.

You have the right to prioritize and nurture your own needs and do so by turning down requests and invites that are too much for you.

"Stressed spelled backwards is desserts." 

-Loreta Laroche

Take time to do what you enjoy.

3. Give Grace

Be patient with yourself and others. It's a tough time for a lot of people and you don't know what's going on in someone else's life. Each person has a finite amount of time and a finite amount of money in their account. 

Be kind to yourself and others. Make sure your self-talk mimics what you would say to a best friend. Offer a smile and an encouraging word to someone who is visibly overwhelmed. It will do you both good.

Forgive yourself and others. Forget about the pursuit of perfection and meeting someone else's measure of holiday spirit. Remind yourself that you are not the only one going through this holiday season with some added stress and practice forgiveness for the shortcomings of yourself and others.

Make a real attempt to set aside family conflicts and arguments. Be the one that steers the family ship to a peaceful harbor, even if it's only a temporary shelter.

4. Fight FOMO

FOMO, the Fear Of Missing Out, spreads like wildfire during the holidays. Commercials and social media posts portraying everyone's "perfect" lives and all the latest possessions and gadgets adds fuel to the fire.

Limit or take a break from social media and the onslaught of advertising. That's a tough thing to do, but necessary if you want to protect your mental health during the holiday season.

Lastly, don't forget that the majority of those posts are just like the ads, staged. They depict an ideal life and an ideal world and set unrealistic expectations. Be grateful for what you have.

5. Build a Budget

A budget is the best gift you can give yourself during the holidays. It will help you avoid a second season of stress when those bills come due in January.

Before the first gift or decorative item is purchased, decide how much you can realistically afford to spend. If you miss the target a little, you'll still have more fun shopping and feel more in control.

Homemade gifts and time spent together are gifts that are remembered and appreciated long after the holidays become a distant memory.

6. Harbor Healthy Habits

The demands of the holidays can easily play havoc with your normal routine and frequently introduce temptation and over-indulgence. Many of these activities can affect your mood and overall physical and mental well-being.

Counteract this by attempting to hold on to healthy habits and routines that are good for you year-round, such as getting good sleep, staying hydrated (beyond the spiked egg nog), exercising, and eating and drinking in moderation.

"It's important to remember that although the hustle and bustle of the holidays are upon you, your daily routine should not end. Your everyday practices help calm and center you, and you will still need them to get through this busy season." 

-Dr. Daisy Sutherland

7. Remain Realistic

There will be disappointments and not all of your holiday expectations will come to pass. Know that perfection is not a realistic expectation and focus on the positive aspects of the holiday season.

Control what you can control, while letting go of what's beyond your direct influence. Embrace change and don't let surprises derail your holiday spirit.

"The truth is that stress doesn't come from your boss, your kids, your spouse, traffic jams, the holidays, or other circumstances. It comes from your thoughts about your circumstances." 

-Andrew Bernstein

8. Prepare a Plan

Don't get caught up in a whirlwind of unplanned time robbers. Choose days that you plan to shop, cook or bake, and visit friends and loved ones. 

Having a roadmap for the holidays can allow you to look forward to tasks and gatherings. They become fun excursions rather than just more obligations. (And don't forget your shopping list, complete with that budget you prepared).

9. Remember the Reason

Slow down and stop to smell the Poinsettias. The hustle and bustle of expectations, events, and gift buying can easily make us lose sight of what the season is all about.

Make sure to maintain your core values and beliefs when making choices and interacting with others.

Not losing the focus on faith, family, and friends will help you navigate the holidays outside the commercial influences.

As we get caught up in the crazy pace of gift shopping, meal planning, and festive decorations, it's good to remember the true spirit of the season: caring, kindness, and love.

"And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord." 

-Luke 2:10, 11 KJV

10. Get Good Guidance

Stay connected with those in your life who support, encourage, and love you unconditionally. Having that foundation will help anchor you when the ship of stress hits rough waves. 

If you feel extremely sad, melancholy, anxious, depressed, or stressed, don't go it alone. Reach out to a close friend, a person of trust, a member of the clergy, or a mental health professional for the needed encouragement and guidance.

Final Thoughts on Maintaining Mental Health Over the Holidays

During the holiday season, it is important to maintain the right perspective. In my very first post, I shared that I lost my oldest son to Covid-19 in October of 2021. This will be the second holiday season without his presence.

I will always miss Greg, especially during the time from Thanksgiving to Christmas. Loss can bring sadness, but I prefer to be thankful for all the holidays I got to share with him and treasure the ability to share the time with my wife Barb, who was in the hospital at the same time but made it home to me.

Whether you find these holidays exciting or stressful, choose to treasure faith and family over festivities, goodness over gadgets, and magic over money.

My hope is that by using the tips above and taking small actions each day, you can make these holidays memorable while still making your mental well-being a priority.

Now go live your best life,

Dan

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